How Much?

3d valentine's day heart shape question marks on white backgroundValentine’s Day is coming up next week and with it brings all sorts of anxiety, on the part of both men and women…but really mostly men.

There are too many expectations around this day. Men are like, “How much do I need to do, or say, or give…that will make her happy?” Because in his mind, he knows he’s probably not going to get it right anyway. Buy her candy and she’s on a diet…disaster. Get her flowers, and she’ll say, “Why do you only give me flowers on Valentine’s Day?” Take her out to dinner and it’s, “We go out to this same restaurant every year.”

In her mind, she’s thinking, “Why can’t he come up with something different and unique to celebrate Valentine’s Day?” “It’s just one day of the year to do something special.” “Hold on, wait a minute,” he replies…there’s also her birthday and, oh yeah, Mother’s Day.”

When she asks him what he wants for Valentine’s Day, it’s something like, “A million dollars or tickets to the Super Bowl.” “If I can’t have that, then nothing.” “That’s doable, NOT!” she shouts. Really, what do you give a guy for Valentine’s Day…tools or a tie? Actually he’d probably like some tools, but that’s really not romantic. Besides, you actually know what he really wants!

When you get right down to it, all anyone really wants for Valentine’s Day is to know that they’re loved unconditionally. It’s just that we’ve come to expect all of this “stuff” based on what society, Hallmark Cards, or a variety of retailers have determined is what we’re supposed to do.

Why not give your loved one a break this Valentine’s Day and together decide what you’d like to do or not do? No expectations, no obligations, and no disappointments. It’s time to remember that it’s the love and friendships you have that really matter. Tell those special people in your life how much they really mean to you. And don’t make it just on Valentine’s Day, show how much you care throughout the year.

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